I'm from the South and was raised in a time when etiquette and hospitality were highly revered. Saying thank you was ingrained into us from birth and to this day I still find myself saying yes sir/no sir and yes, ma'am/no ma'am. When making introductions, I am automatically recalling the protocol of who to introduce first based on the people present and the situation. I call people Mr. or Mrs. unless they tell me otherwise. I get etiquette and being polite.
I am ready to advocate for digital etiquette. In an age where incoming information is drowning us, can we agree to some work protocols to help minimize the onslaught of DMs, emails, texts, and virtual meetings? I realize this may step on some toes but times have changed. The volume of clutter and chaotic noise of simple "thank you" emails/DMs or the "reply all" when it is completely unnecessary is about to drive me up the wall. The latest bad habit that seems to be developing is the message that says "Hi." You are then left either waiting to see the dots to indicate more typing or getting sucked into the vortex and replying "Hey" back.
Let's help each other out and agree to some basic digital etiquette rules.
State your message or question all in one send. Do not start with "hey" and follow it up with five more separate questions in separate messages. Think about what it is you want to say or ask and send it in one coherent and concise message.
Know when to use reply all and when not. If your response is pertinent to the original message and needs to be known by all parties, use reply all. Otherwise, DO NOT USE IT.
Do not bombard people with follow-ups like "Did you get my message?" If what you are sending is time sensitive, then state that you need a response by XYZ date/time. Then, give the person the space to process and respond. If we are professionals, then let's treat each other as such. If they miss your deadline, then follow up accordingly.
If you find yourself in a DM real-time volley, then just call each other or meet virtually. It will be so much faster and eliminate confusion, assumptions, and reading between the lines.
Just because you see someone's dot is green or they are active online, don't assume they are available. They may be in heads-down mode working or have just been given an emergency assignment. In this situation, refer back to #1.
Technology has advanced and we have access to nearly everyone's calendar--especially our colleagues. If you need to schedule a meeting, use the calendar to find a time. And, when you schedule the meeting, give it a clear title, attach any documents or information that needs to be previewed, and provide an agenda. Make the most of people's time and do not waste it. If you have to schedule with someone outside of your organization, then again leverage technology. Set up a Calendly account or another scheduling application so you can identify your availability and the external stakeholder can book a time that works for their schedule. Nothing is more frustrating than the back and forth of "Does this work for you" followed by "That time just got booked."
And, while Thank You is certainly a kind gesture, it is not required for every digital exchange. Don't add to the noise with a cacophony of needless messages.
Know when a meeting should occur versus an email or a call.
Know who needs to be at the meeting and who simply needs to be informed of the decisions afterward. Time is precious.
Be concise and considerate. It is not impolite to be direct. You can still be kind while stating the point. Remember, tone and voice are not easily conveyed in digital comms.
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